Current Members

Nanette - We're a little confused about Nanette. We swear we saw that Nanette was one of the Smurflings, sister to Sassette, Slouchy, Snappy, etc. But now we can't find anything about her existence. Perhaps her name is a childhood nickname of "Nanny Smurf" (shown here, first appearing on the show in episode 53 for the nerds among you). But whether she's a real smurfling or just Nanny Smurf back when she was just a young thing, she's Brainy's wife and the male Smurfs have all concluded that she has a bitchin' sexy voice. (Actually all the female Smurfs do -- just about every time they play the non-Smurfs start making lewd comments about them when they're not listening!)

Shadow Smurf - Shadow is also Hefty Smurf, and is a member of the new Smurfs II clan (read more about that below).

Favorite Maps: Sujo, Enowapi, Desert Glory, The Ruins, Death Trap, Vigilance
Favorite Guns: AK-47, M14, M60E3
Favorite Songs: Dido - White Flag, NIN - Closer, Outkast - Hey-Ya, The Beastie Boys - No Sleep 'Till Brooklyn
Favorite Wrap: Wax paper

Flying Smurf - (picture to be added soon) Flying Smurf sounds suspiciously like Papa Smurf, and is a member of the new Smurfs II clan. The Smurfs have become one of the most popular clans on SOCOM II, so we're opening up another clan to hold even more Smurfs. Soon you won't be able to go into a room without finding a Smurf! muahahahaha.

Clumsy Smurf - I don't know much about Clumsy Smurf yet, all I know is that he's trying hard to avoid his tedency to jump on his own mines, fall off of cliffs, blow up claymores when he's standing right next to them, and rush breaches BEFORE the C4 goes off. Good luck to him on all that!

Grouchy Smurf - Grouchy Smurf accidentally made his name "Grumpy Smurf" (our fault actually) but maybe we'll get him to change it. Grumpy is SIMMS, long-time sworn enemy of the Smurfs. We like him, it's just that he's the leader of the CTK clan and he thinks we're a bunch of traitors. He might be right, but we finally won him over I guess!

Wild Smurf - Wild Smurf is also Tootall on SOCOM II. He's, uhh, definitely a different sort of character. He's a history teacher. But he's not that old, fatherly kind of character who wants to teach you reverence for the Holocaust; he's more like the wiseass teacher that offers the students pot and seduces the attractive chicks. But every team needs a loose screw, so here he is. You know what they say, the squeaky wheel gets the grease! (ewww)

Drunkn Smurf - Drunkn Smurf is JP's friend Pete. Drunkn likes to find a nice little spot and just sit there drinking whatever liquor he currently fancies, round after round, spraying bullets at anyone that tries to interrupt his alcohol-induced stupor.

Gargamel - Gargamel joined us the same night as the other three new recruits below. Being smurfs, we're a little concerned about having a guy on our team who wants to boil us and eat our little blue guts. But so far he's been keeping his distance, usually running off by himself and popping guys in the head (probably so he can take THEM home and boil them).

King Smurf - King Smurf joined us just before Brainy and Greedy. I guess he hasn't been playing very long, but he's a really fast learner because he's already very good.

The story of King Smurf: While Papa Smurf is away on a trip, the Smurfs decide to appoint themselves a new leader. One of them is elected and immediately puts on a crown, an ermine coat, takes a sceptre and calls himself: “King Smurf”. He acts like a dictator. The Smurfs rise up against him and take to the bush, it’s a civil war. Fortunately, Papa Smurf returns to the village and everything returns to normal.

Brainy Smurf - Another new recruit! Brainy Smurf likes to approach things in an intellectual way. So, instead of rushing like a madman with a noobie cannon, Brainy tends to stay back with a sniper rifle and pick people off slowly. He likes the timing and mathematics of the whole thing, figuring out his enemies' distance, speed and direction so he can hit them at just the right moment. He's such a nerd.

Greedy Smurf - Greedy Smurf just joined us last night. True to his name, he's a greedy little bastard for MVP's and kills!

Jokey Smurf - Jokey is Vanity's friend in real life. Although I don't know much about him, I'm sure he's very, very funny.

Farmer Smurf - Also known as Deathcard on SOCOM II, Farmer is a good friend of the clan and an awesome SOCOM player, particularly on defense. He can often be found at his base, carrying around his really, really big turnip.

Vanity Smurf - Vanity is Smurfette and Sassette's baby brother, and puts his mirror down long enough to manage to stay ahead the clan most of the time.

Smurfette - Hefty Smurf's wife and big sister to Sassette and Vanity. Smurfette doesn't get to play very often due to her duties servicing the other 100 smurfs (which she does with great relish).

Hefty Smurf - Hefty is Smurfette's husband and Sassette and Vanity Smurf's brother-in-law. Hefty is, of course, the athletic smurf and organizer of the first Smurf Olympics. Hefty was also known as Silent Will and Samadhi on SOCOM II.

Sassette - Sassette Smurfling is Papa Smurf's woman (the cradle-robbing perv!) and a great SOCOM player in her own right. Being Papa's woman isn't just about being a Smurfy little tart--it also comes with responsibilities. Sassette is our "clan mistress" and helps keeps our Smurfy little asses organized.

Papa Smurf - Papa Smurf is our most humble leader and, as he frequently reminds us, one of the prettiest men on earth. Papa is also known as CPT INSANE-O on SOCOM II, and both names are also known universally as: "THAT DAMN CAMPER!"